Why do we need coping mechanisms?

Are coping mechanisms good or bad? 

 The short answer is: Coping mechanisms are great. 

Listen, when you are in fight or flight if your choices are to lose your mind or to have a cigarette of course I'd rather my clients go for the cigarette. 

Coping mechanisms are a clear indicator that you want to live. That you're fighting for your life through all means possible. 

BUT 

Here's the longer answer... 

There are different types of coping mechanisms. 

Let's take coping mechanisms for anxiety 

One person my turn to alcohol for "liquid courage" when they're about to go into a social situation. 

Once they get a little buzz going, their inhibitions are lowered and suddenly they are ready to socialize. 

Another person may know that their breathe serves as an inner pharmacy. They're nervous about meeting new people so they make time to do a short breathwork session. Suddenly, their nervous system gets reprogrammed, they feel at ease and they are now ready to socialize. 

Now let's take a further look...

The person who uses alcohol is now at the mercy of alcohol to feel ready to socialize. If the buzz starts to go down, they have to physically go out of their way to find a way to get it back up again. 

And we all know that the more you drink the more your chances of really losing your inhibitions go up. People aren't really getting to know you, their getting to know a version of you that is scared and overcompensating with alcohol.

So of course you feel that on a subconscious level and your fears of socializing are now being magnified because deep down you know, that you're not making real connections. Which makes you feel lonely.  

Not only that but the effects of alcohol start to consume you. You feel hungover, you start gaining weight and having skin issues. You lose days out of your life to nurse hangovers and it just becomes this whole problem in your life. 

Now let's look at the person whose used her breath as a coping mechanism... 

She's created a ritual in which she learns to calm her mind by connecting back to her body using her breath. 

She says a prayer asking God to remind her of her worthiness and her amazingness. 

She remembers that she is worthy and that she brings a whole lot of value everywhere she goes. 

She does a quick 10 minute breath work session to lock in her thoughts into her nervous system and she is off. 

When she meets new people she is genuine and people get to know her for who she really is. As a result she feels connected and reenergized. 

She feels alive and confident. As a results, she creates a cycle of growth and connection and confidence. The only consequences of this are that she has more choices to make because life keeps throwing so many amazing people and opportunities at her. 

But she knows her path, so it is easy to discern. 

So yes, coping mechanisms are good and helpful

But you need to be able to discern which ones are going to support you in the long run. Which ones are going to help you feel better for life and which ones are actually going to make things worst. 

If you are looking for a better way to cope with things like anger, low self-worth, & people pleasing- Healing Cove is for you. This do at your own pace program is a blend of hypnosis, breathwork and somatic healing to help you turn your life around. 

Find our more about Healing Cove HERE